i've been avoiding this update tbh and contemplating whether or not to even write about it buti figured i might as well just rip the bandaid off.
if anyone noticed, i removed bucket from my pets page. this is because we rehomed her... kinda.
so, she is actually with her original family. the people who own her parents and many of her siblings (of which there are 8). she was never for sale. she and her siblings were stolen, and then she was wrongfully sold to us by shitpoop (who tried to steal my other dog odin).
well, through some miracle her original owners got some of the puppies back as well as bucket, some siblings actually work in the police! bucket herself should have been there from the start, we could never give her the life she needed which is why we wanted to rehome her. it is literally by a miracle that she belongs to her original owners, and is with her parents again.
does it hurt? no, it's bittersweet but she will be so much happier! odin and mishka (my other dogs) just didn't get along with bucket either. so it really just all worked out. i'm happy for everyone involved.
shitpoop is still on his bs. we're working with bucket's og owners to get a case against him. he pretends to train difficult dogs, but really he makes them fight. like a dog fighting ring. and when the authorities hear about it, he runs away to egypt. and the cycle repeats.
i will try to keep this story updated but i'm not sure how much i can say (not that anyone here knows my irl name etc etc) but just to be safe!
i have left the house twice in two weeks as opposed to once a month maybe? first was for mother's day (30th march in the uk), i took my mom to tgi friday's and we both had our first espresso martini (a lil strong for me but she loved it). then today we went to the tesco cafe (which is really good btw) so like yeah! i'm enjoying life for once and it only took like 10ish years!! happy to be alive!!
i'm attempting to find time for my sites, other than keeping it updated via blogs n adding site buttons, fanlistings etc etc. i have a few things in the drafts but little motivation for them right now.
my creativity has been directed onto art, paitning and making things, even cooking/baking. i'm gonna make blueberry lemonade sometime soon! and i'm getting into diamond paitning! it's an exciting time right now!
until then, thanks for reading!!
i just got home from london (i live in the north of england) that's a 4 hour drive there and back. i am so tired.
basically we had to go because my sister needed her passport! because they didn't have her fingerprints yet and blah blah blah it's a long and boring thing!
i don't think i have ever mentioned it but i (and my sister, parents etc) were born in south africa, and we moved to england in '08. my sister was but an infant then and i was 10.
we had to drive cause anyone living in england will know how expensive train tickets are nowadays. i'm talking the CHEAPEST from where i live to london is £300. for a return ticket. so yeah, we drove. and i never want to get into a car ever again lol.
as far as site updates go, i am still working on my magical girl shrine and my bratz shrine, amongst other projects i have off the web!
that's all for now!! byeeee
anyway, yesterday was my sister and mother's joint birthday party! and my sister's actual real life 18th birthday. which means a) she is a whole ass adult now and b) i was 18 10 years ago... man. my mom's birthday is tomorrow though.
the party itself was pretty good! it was a small gathering of family and friends at this cute little gin bar! my mom and i made the food and cake. it was a tacos and cake party so really, who could complain?
i did my best with the cakes, my moms was a carrot cake with cream cheese frosting (similar to red velvet cake frosting) with little pink chocolate tulips on top as my mom loves tulips! unfortunately i have no photos of the cake, i have been living life through my eyes and not a phone screen lately lol.
my sister's cake i did sorta get a picture of? here just have a look for yourself, i slaved away at this cake and i'm sorta proud of myself considering i had never made something like this before.
it was a vanilla cake with a strawberry jam centre. the brains and hearts at the top were made with chocolate and the dripping bright blood was strawberry sauce! everyone loved it! it was tasy heh.
it's been a stressful week, party planning is not for me and luckily i don't have to do it again until august for my own birthday!
today's entry is not valentine's related, but i thought i'd get it out of the way!
today i'm gonna yap about something i am quite passionate about and that is donating preloved goods... i guess that's sorta on theme with valentines?
the thought came to me when i mentioned on my profile that i wanted to include my funko figures on my figures page, as i left out a majority of them but included my genshin ones because hoyoverse has a sniper outside my window. kidding. honestly, when i made the page i was lazy and didn't want to go through all 40+ funko figures and put them on my page... and since then i have gotten rid of a lot of them.
i would say that i have outgrown - become less interested in many of the fandoms in which figures i owned. namely star wars, marvel, a few anime and movies etc. so owning these figures just felt weird to me, and they were collecting dust.
i wanted to resell them as i know i had spent a considerable amount of money on my collection over the years but the figures i had collected didn't hold much value, and i wasn't going to sell something for under £5 plus shipping, i'm lazy as we all know. so i did the next, and really the best overall thing... i donated them.
i enjoy donating things and get more joy knowing a little kid or another collector is gonna find a hidden gem in a charity shop (thrift stores in the uk) than waiting forever for someone online to buy it.
i also donate clothes that either don't fit me or i just never wear. again, i just get a warm fuzzy feeling rather than reselling them.
i have also in the past donated a nunch of old cosplay wigs (i washed them don't worry) to my old high school's drama department. it felt good to give back rather than to attempt to resell them? and way better environmentally to donate them than just throw them away.
and i know how important charity shops are, i know a lot of them where i live will give things to struggling families for free... i am an immigrant from south africa, when i got to the uk i didn't have much, especially warm clothing. we sold a lot to be able to just get over to the uk. so charity shops really helped me and my family! so this is me giving back, in some weird way that makes me seem like i have a saviour complex.. i promise i don't! i'm just a giver!!
overall, or tldr... my funko figure collection has shrunk! i don't actively seek them out as i do prefer anime figures nowadays. if i do buy a funko figure, it's usually because i really, really love a character or design... yes i have bought one recently; or well, pre-ordered one... it's sabrina carpenter can you blame me?
anyway, that's enough yapping! toodles!
okay that's enough weirdness. i had a poll up on my index page asking who i should cosplay, i wasted your time with that one. i had a poor time management moment and didn't realise how soon the con was (yesterday btw) and it was cold as fuck (why do we have our cons in winter??) so although furina won the poll, i hadn't gotten her wig or pretty much anything yet. i chose to cosplay rukia as i have her cosplay pretty all set and done, plus her Shihakusho (i think that's what it's called) is warm!! sorry rhaenyra, nobody voted for you girl, you're a renfaire cosplay (whenever renfaire happens in the uk again).
anyway face reveal??
enjoy that. i'm insecure.
ANYWAY!! i'm still working on my genshin oc page, i'm kinda worried about it cause i cannot draw, i have tried and it is not for me but i love making characters so i have just used another anime girly as my oc's faceclaim, i suppose? don't judge me for it. i'll commission an artist one day when i'm a big person.
until that day, toodles!!
honestly my life has thankfully been boring and chill. my doctor upped my dose in meds so i feel a lot better, kinda? i'm not sad and i am not having many sad spells (or depression ig?) as often as i used to. my anxiety is still touch and go but it's anxiety, whataya gonna do?
if anything had changed it's my ability to give a fuck about things. i truly do not seem to care about things (small things, annoying things etc). there may also be a lack of empathy there too but my doctor did say it's a temporary side effect. tbh, i hope it sticks around. i have always been a very empathetic person, and it has lead me getting hurt more often than not.
i got myself a little desk organiser though! i have a lot of makeup and skincare stuff so this was a huge yay big brain moment for me. it's white but i kinda wanna paint it or arts n crafts it to look more girly and pink to match my room. actually, i wanna do that to a lot of my "plain" things. my white ps5 looks so boring, i need a cute pastel cover for it to match my controller which is pink and kitty themed!
on a downer, my favourite site middlepot is closing down, along with melissa's store and her game (my fluffy life). i'm mostly sad about the game leaving, as a gaymer it breaks my heart when a good game just disappears but - i get it. sometimes even a life off of social media but with your own website can be overwheliming.
speaking of social media, i only have instagram really but i never post (i just stalk sabrina carpenter). i'm thinking it's time to make a library / bookshelf on rhinedottir instead! alas, css still hates me.
i am a person that is very easily influenced - friend a (been friends for roughly 4 years) says hey! come back to twitter (i rp there usually) and i say:
knowing damn well i do not fare well on x.com. alas, i gave into temptation.rookie mistake! got into a friend group, all was well until friend b shows up... man. this chick. this 19 year old child did not know how to just shut the FUCK up!!! she was a yapper - the type of yapper that yaps about one thing and doesn't leave an inch of a gap for another person to speak.
and oh boy did i give it to her one faithful evening. pretty much tldr told her to be quiet and let others speak (i can only stand listening to star wars for so long man). and apparently i was too passive aggressive with it. all i did was say what everybody else was thinking. and all the other friends were like "she's so young waaah" -- no. that is a 19 year old. not a 14 year old, not an infant. a 19 year old in college, 2 years shy of being able to drink and vote (in their country of america).
mind you, everyone was so worried about this """young 19 year old""", it ain't mine nor anybody else's job to fucking babysit. LIFE IS CRUEL! if you cannont handle me telling you to be quiet and let someone else speak, HO HO HOOOO good luck in the real world, babe!!! oh but did these other friends not like my reality check!! friend b along with some others idgaf about decide to block me (good riddance!!!) until tonight friend c decides to bring everyone into a group call (fuck discord too) to ""sort things out""..
when i tell you this was all a ruse against me... it was more a public lynching, a witch hunt if you will. i was being attacked left right and bloody center here. i'm talking being called horrible, delusional (because apparently calling someone delulu unironically is a thing?). and i was sitting there like... i don't need to be here. you aren't listening to me, you aren't willing to allow me to explain myself or apologise if i need to. so fuck it. i left the discord server, i deleted all my twitter accounts and then twitter itself. and i will be suing mr elongated muskrat for waste of time (this is a joke).
in conclusion, fuck twitter, fuck those bitches and happy fucking new year.
my dog odin has been a very reactive dog since we got him, his "breeders" were extremely neglectful and he was tied up in a garage for the majority of his puppy life (i think we got him at 3 months?). when we brought him home he was covered in what seemed to be dried hot glue, paint and he STANK. long story short, he had a terrible time before we got him.
we knew he was going to need help from outside sources to help with his reactivity, out friends that have the same dog breeds as us recommended a dog trainer who i will be calling shitpoop for legal resons.
there were red flags when it came to shitpoop from the beginning but we overlooked them because he was so good with dogs like odin.
the biggest one that we should have paid attention to was that he clearly has some negative feelings towards women. for example: when he did a home visit to our previously mentioned friends, he completely ignored the woman (even though the dogs in their house belonged to her).
skipping ahead now, we drop odin off with shitpoop like 3 hours away from our home and we were told he would stay there for roughly 3 weeks to a month. the date was the 17th of september, we expected him back the 17th of october... that did not happen. we only got odin back the 8th of november. shitpoop would not give our dog back. and he knew exactly what he was doing.
each week odin spent with shitpoop cost us £300. we had planned a month. so when the week following october 17th rolled... we began lacking the funds. and this guy did not care. he showered us with promises that our dog will be so much better and that he "just isn't ready" to come home yet. bullshit. we should have just gone and picked him up, but this guy hardly answered his messages or picked up the phone to talk to us. we had one address for him, but he travelled between two places.
here is where things start to get very sus... when we left odin this guy sold us another puppy, not professional knowing we were having issues with one dog... but we were looking for a third anyway. bucket, our puppy cost us £500. all together we gave this asshole roughly £1,200. and yet he tells us we still owe him £800... for what? i have no idea. but, i believe shitpoop sold us bucket and kept odin for longer knowing our financial situation... because he wanted to keep odin. nuh uh. he's ours. he really believed that we would just give up on our boy? wrong house bud!!
well, amongst the car issues we were also having, we asked if he would drop odin off at our house, thats how he got my address (remember this for later). he never responded. it took a lot of haggling etc before we eventually got a day and got our damn dog back.
then shit hit the roof. he was harassing us constantly about paying him back, we did not have the money to pay him this stupid sum of money and he didn't understand that. we offered to pay him monthly £50 and instead of agreeing he decided to go on a social media rampage (another reason i hate social media) and doxxed us. our address, my mother's instagram. the messages she was getting from random strangers was horrible. people were calling her a tramp, skank and whore. threatening her and demanding she pay shitpoop or "or debt". random strangers.
let me just slide in that this guy did this allll on his business instagram that has 9K followers. it's a private account but 9K is 9K. thankfully nothing went beyond threatening messages (some guy legit asked him if he should come and pick up odin from us?? dude??). but all it could take is 1 person amongst the 9K to show up at our house. yes we have security cams, yes we would have called the police but at what cost? some weirdo turning up and traumatising us? my house consists of myself, my mom and my minor sister. i suffer with adhd, anxiety and ptsd as is. my sister suffers with autism and epilepsy and does have seizures when in extreme stress. i am thankful nothing happened. but jesus christ it could have turned out so fucking horribly.
now, after the panic had worn off, we did contact the police and because it was (to them) not an emergency, they didn't come... in fact, they still haven't come to see us or take a statement. oh, and doxxing isn't illegal in the UK. go figure!
shitpoop has threatened us with legal action (opening a civil case) but we are yet to hear from that. and i doubt he will do anything because we have all the screenshots of his harrassment and doxxing. oh, and his refusal of the £50.
this guy is so shady! we've learnt that he does drugs regularly (the super bad kind) and owns a fucking lion in egypt?? man.
i haven't heard from him since he threatened us with legal action. i am begging it happens. i want to see that mans face when a judge tells him to fuck off. but who knows.
it sucked overall. this isn't how you conduct business at all. he took advantage of us and then tried to spin the story.
we've heard that there have been many of his followers that are against him for what he did, stating that we (or my mother) haven't responded at all (and we never will). many berated him for airing out dirty laundry in public and began a smear campaign. there are good people in the world.
is it over? i don't know. but for now, i am calm and i am manifesting the worst karma for this piece of human scum.
well!! that's all i really have to say! until next time, and with a better update! signing off! jay
signing off! jay
signing off! jay
signing off! jay
cats are easier when it comes to spaying and such, but dogs are interesting... they don't do well under anaesthesia. and as we suspected, mishka's heart stopped. don't worry!! she is good now, it is very common for dogs for their hearts to stop or to stop breathing. everything is okay and her vets are amazing. but it is still not a phone call you want to get.
so i'm just trying to relax, mess around with html and chill. that's all. i will keep everyone updates on how mishka is doing soon! edit april 6th: mishka is fine and doing well but still recovering!
